Whisper Cursing About Adverbs

Lolly Lolly Lolly Get Your Adverbs Here

Let’s talk adverbs. Over the past several years, I’ve noticed that an increasing number of people do not understand how adverbs work. Granted, most people probably don’t care all that much, but that’s also part of the problem.

Sometimes I take a few minutes to browse Substack just to see what else is out there. I came across one focused on two interesting topics, but its (official) title contains a glaring grammatical error. He seems to have a nice following and great engagement in comment sections, but I simply could not get past the mistake in the title.

Imagine you enjoyed reading about, say, health and wellness topics and you came across a stack named:

How To Eat Healthy And Live Longer

Do you see it? Please tell me you see it.

It should read: How To Eat Healthily And Live Longer

If I say I’m going to teach you to eat healthy and I stop at the word healthy, your first question to me might be something like, “You’re going to teach me to eat healthy what? Healthy vegetables? Healthy breads? Healthy sugary, chocolatey desserts? What, precisely will you teach me about eating, ma’am?”

In the context above “healthy” is an adjective and should modify a noun. Instead the person used this adjective to modify the verb “eat,” rudely usurping the rightful duty of the adverb “healthily.” It made me melt down faster than one of Joe Biden’s mint chocolate chip ice cream cones after Corn Pop knocks it onto the pavement in July.

Just saying.

Please support my grammar crusades as well as our petite ferme activities, if you can, by buying me a coffee. Your support helps me as well as my family more than words can ever say.

Going on about nothing

At this point you might think I’m prattling on about nothing. After all, it’s one Substack. Can’t I just move on? Well, no. No, I cannot just move on. I have seen this very same mistake in professional signage for prominent businesses in my area. I also see people using an adjective where an adverb belongs in all manner of published articles and documentation. These appear in magazines, books, newspapers, you name it. News anchors do it as do many government officials.

Our language is being continually degraded and no one even seems to notice. Or if they notice, they shrug it off and don’t care. I’m not perfect. I make mistakes when I write, especially when I’m in a rush and simply trying to shoot off a quick comment. Comment sections are different in that they’re closer to casual conversations where people speak colloquially, etc.

In the interest of maintaining my composure, I’ll leave you with this little review about adverbs: